Look, the start of spring may bring to mind new life and flowers and bright colors and what not. But someone forgot to tell your favorite streaming services about that.
Quite frankly, there's a good bit of death and destruction and just general dark moods going into the third month of the year. There's a lot of star power behind it, as well as some incredible storytelling.
But you're maybe going to need a minute out in the light when it's all over.
Let's take a look at what's new on Netflix, Amazon Prime Video, Hulu, HBO and Disney+ in March 2020.
What's new on Netflix in March 2020
Tigers, ligers and killers — oh, my! Look, there's so much on Netflix this March you're just going to have to hit up the list to see it all. But we'd be remiss if we didn't lead with the story of Joe Exotic, the rare-cat trainer from Florida with a killer mullet and — well, we'll dispatch with the "killer" jokes there. Because this quintessential Florida Man was convicted in federal court of hiring someone to kill the CEO of Big Cat Rescue in Tampa and ...
Yes, it's a true story. It all happened. And it's all in Tiger King, which premiers on Netflix on March 20.
That's just for starters, of course.
Elsewhere on Netflix in March, we've got a new season of the food show Ugly Delicious, as well as new standup (or sit-down) comedy from the ever-thoughtful Marc Maron.
See what's new on Netflix in March
Everything you could possibly want
What's that? You somehow don't have a Netflix account? Let's take care of that, shall we? Because it's got more content than you have hours in your life. Think about that for a minute.
What's new on Amazon Prime Video in March
Keeping with the themes of animals and people death, there's Blow The Man Down on Amazon Prime Video. If you've ever been on the coast of Maine you could see how something like this might happen. It's often a dark and forbidding place. (It's also quite beautiful.)
Anyway, BTMD tells the story of Mary Beth and Priscilla Connolly. They're grieving the loss of their mother when they have a run-in with a dangerous man. And a brick. Or maybe a harpoon. And nothing good ever comes with the mention of a harpoon.
Also on Amazon Prime Video in March: Tim Gunn and Heidi Klum are back and in stye with Making the Cut, and we get a dose of Agatha Christie in The Pale Horse.
See what's new on Amazon Prime Video in March
All the video
From countless original series and movies to the best that Hollywood has to offer — plus a deep bench of subscription channels — Amazon Prime Video is a must-have.
What's new on Hulu in March 2020
If there's one thing you've got to watch on Hulu this March, it's Little Fires Everywhere. Reese Witherspoon's Elena invites Kerry Washington's Mia into her home. But not everything is what it seems.
Yes, all you're getting from us here is that one nondescript line — we're not going to spoil anything. (The book's worth a read, though.) Toss in Rosemarie DeWitt and Joshua Jackson and Hulu has the makings of a decent little hit on its hands.
Also up for Hulu this March is that it becomes the new home for all of the on-demand content from FX, which is good because Devs is coming from FX in March. And it's going to be weird. Which is exactly what we want from the likes of Alex Garland, who you know from Ex Machina and Annihilation.
(And speaking of Hulu: It's also become the largest live-TV streaming service in the United States. So there's that.)
See what's new on HBO in March
All the TV you could ever want
Hulu has made a name for itself with a huge back catalog and stellar originals like The Handmaid's Tale. And now it's got a large stable of live channels — and it's fully integrated in the world of Disney and Disney+.
What's new on HBO in March 2020
Westworld. Westworld is what's new on HBO in March. And things are going to get bleak as Delores and pals break into our world — and not with the greatest of intentions in mind.
On the other hand, maybe we deserve it. Or, OK. Maybe the fictional human world of Westworld deserves it. But maybe we do, too.
Want more shiny happy killing on HBO in March? Look for the premiere of Hunter Killer to open the month, X-Men: Dark Phoenix three weeks in*, with The Plot Against America sandwiched between.
See what's new on HBO in March
It's not TV — at least that's what they say
Even with the end of Game of Thrones, there's still more than enough quality shows on HBO to easily justify a subscription. Plus it's available pretty much everywhere.
What's new on Disney+ in March
A little feel-good may be just what Disney ordered in March. Stargirl tells the story — based on the New York Times' Bestseller — about a high-school boy falling for the free-spirited new girl. But you'll never guess what happens next.
Also look for the premiere of Be Our Chef — a magical cooking challenge featuring a pair of families.
And of course there are the other Disney+ staples like Star Wars: The Clone Wars and Diary of a Future President.
See what's new on Disney+ in March
Basically what isn't on Disney+, right?
Disney+ is so much more than Disney. It's also Star Wars. It's also Marvell. It's also National Geographic. It's also a world of original content and old favorites that you can't find anywhere else.
